In search of motivation!

Well, my get up and go has definitely got up and gone today! I know Mondays are always a bit bleurgh, but this seems to be an exceptionally bad one.

I am still really tired which doesn't help. Rebecca seems to have given up having a full nights sleep at the moment. Yesterday she was up at half past five despite a late night on Saturday and today she was up at six even though we don't have to get up until seven for school. She was hard work yesterday mainly because she was so tired by the afternoon which always impacts on her behaviour. We battled through homework without too much hassle thankfully. She then trashed her bedroon by trying to climb on her chest of drawers and knocking it over. This took two hours to sort out. There was no help from the Teenage Drama Queen who sat on Twitter and Facebook all day despite the fact that she was supposed to be revising for a big maths assessment at school. I can see a battle coming up with her over her computer usage but couldn't deal with it yesterday as Rebecca was taking up my time.

I was supposed to be working today but am so knackered that I managed to move the job to tomorrow. I still need to go the the shops and the bank though. I have the online exam this week for the Internet Assessor job, at this rate I'll be falling asleep over the keyboard doing it. The thought of that is stressing me out as I don't want to think about what I'll do financially if I don't get this job. Yikes!!! To add to my stress, Rebecca has a hospital appointment on Friday when Ii hope that we'll hear that her genetic tests for Fragile X syndrome came back negative. It is expected that they will be negative but I will still worry until I know for definite. I also have to build myself up to push the paediatrician for more help with Rebecca's language skills.

So it does feel a bit like everything is a constant battle at the moment and my energy level is so low that I just want tto hide under the duvet. But instead I am giving myself a mental shake, popping to the shops and then going to spend an hour baking. This is my secret pleasure, it always boosts me and will hopefully make me feel more able to cope with the rest of the day.

So onwards and upwards, bye for now

love Riki xxx