Wednesday 10 October 2012

Progress

Some things may be falling apart, including me, but the really important stuff seems to be getting better! I had a phone call today from the Speech and Language Therapist who recently assessed Rebecca. The school had asked her to see Rebecca this time because she had previously had speech therapy for receptive and expressive language delays but had not been reassessed for ages. Anyway, the Therapist carried out a Language Link assessment and the good news was that Rebecca has made huge progress. She was slightly behind in one area but doesn't need any further speech therapy.

I'm really pleased about this and Rebecca is continuing to make progress in literacy and maths too so we seem to be getting somewhere!

Some things stagnate though. The ex may be coming tonight to see the girls but I am still waiting for him to let me know. I have a stinking cold too so if he does turn up then hopefully Ill infect him!!

Bye for now

Love Riki xxx

Tuesday 9 October 2012

In the name of the father.....

I've written before about my ex not seeing the girls enough but it's becoming an issue again. He hasn't seen them for two weeks and hasn't had them overnight since August. He phones maybe once a week and when he sees them in the week its for two hours max at our house and most of that time is spent watching TV. He does continue to support them financially and when things come up like Teenage Drama Queen's trip to Paris then he will pay his share.

The problem is that he doesn't seem to understand that parenting is not just about paying for your kids. It's about giving them your time and attention and taking an active part in their life. There is no doubt that he loves them but I'm coming to the conclusion that this love at a distance is all he's capable of and it makes me really sad for them. Whether this is to do with hang ups from his own childhood, I don't know. He lost his Dad at 14 and his mum was never very demonstrative. I'm just frustrated that I can't fix this for the girls. I can't make him be a better Dad.

In the meantime I carry on parenting 24/7 which with a child with special needs can be exhausting especially when there is no sign of a break for me at any time. I'm good at multi tasking but its not easy to be the mother and the father too

Monday 1 October 2012

Still here, hanging on and not quite sinking yet

My poor neglected blog! I can't believe how long it is since I wrote. I am a very naughty blogger!!

Anyway, not much has changed. I'm still here and still broke, overworked and knackered. Currently have five jobs. Three of which involve writing, hurrah! None of them pay particularly well but they mean that we are just about hanging on.

The teenager is good at the moment, her hormones seem to have settled and the tantrums and bitchy outbursts have virtually ceased. She's actually working hard at school, looking at college applications and choosing A levels for next year.

Rebecca's statement of special needs was agreed in March but the extra help was not up and running until September and the start of the new year. It seems to be going well at the moment, she's happy and likes her teacher. We saw her paediatrician last month and I tried to ask him about sensory processing disorder but he was quite dismissive. I do still think that Rebecca has some issues with sensory processing though and I'm not quite sure how to proceed now. She had some behavioural problems over the summer and started lashing out, particularly at her sister. I think part of the problem is that she finds it difficult to express herself if she gets angry. The paediatrician has offered to send me to a group for parents who have children with challenging behaviour but I've cut down on her TV time, tightened up on discipline and routines and there has already been a big improvement.

As for the cat, he's less psycho now. I told him that he's now middle aged in cat years so he needs to start being sensible.

So that's where we are at the moment. We might not have moved forward a lot but sometimes its an achievement just to manage to stay in the same place!

Bye for now

love Riki xxxx